1. Apparently Dan and Slav still read this. And apparently drunken-Slav proclaimed that my fuck buddies article "changed his life" (or at least got him thinking in a way he hadn't before) so I guess this blog is worth something after all. But wait, what's this? Real names on Blogger? Nonono. Nicknames will be needed. From now on, I dub thee: ...Oh fuck it, Dan and Slav.
2. So sometimes when I'm feeling bored and nostalgic I roam the interwebs for the digital debris that we inevitably leave behind in our lifetimes. And by that I would usually mean "I read all of the blogbuddies old blogs" except today I remembered something special and new: ISK had a blog. Yup, remember her? Indian Sex Kitty? JV's flirty Giffle that we all thought would move on to OSK after graduation? The girl that basically moved into my room Senior year? justanotherteenblog101.blogspot.com?
In reading her old stuff with about 3 years of distance, it reminded me of a theory I have. Guys are to Girls as Sports are to Guys. Guys are the safe, go-to conversation topic when there's nothing else terribly interesting to talk about, similar to the way guys talk about football or baseball. One of the things I was never crazy about in my high school group of female friends (with some exceptions, of course) was that sometimes I felt like no matter how much we had in common, this all got shoved aside because we were too busy talking about our guy friends. "The triangle" was literally the top of the pyramid, and we were the third row following them around. On the other hand, I always felt closer to the guys anyway (as did the other girls, I think) so if anything I only added to this and probably shouldn't complain. Especially seeing as I'm likely the only one that still talks to any of them anyway. This was actually one of the (very few) reasons that prompted me to favor a women's college over a coed one when it came time to pick. I wanted to feel just as bonded with and excited about my female friends as I did my male ones.
Then again, to a certain extent it's always been that way for me in particular, and not necessarily everyone. I'm used to not having a lot of material things in common with most of my friends to begin with. We talk about common people, feelings, experiences, goals, and injokes; but only rarely hobbies, books, TV shows and movies, or games. (I guess I've always had kind of oddball taste. Or maybe just no life.) One of the things that I initially found really refreshing about having a male group of friends on highschool was the clear shift in focus (well, at least before 1am), and I always wondered if it made the conversation somehow more valuable or the bonds between the people somehow longer-lasting.
The obvious answer I guess is any friendship requires a solid balance of both- and it would do everyone well once-in-awhile to make an effort to avoid the "go-to" conversation topic (whatever it is for your gender, or group of friends, or just that particular relationship) and pull in something new.
Oh, and if you were wondering, even at women's college, we still manage to happily devote a a large chunk of time to talking about dudes. Then again, we also devote a hefty amount of time to talking about basically everybody, so I'd like to think there's a happy balance in there somewhere.
