The Real World

So technically work computers and internet are not to be used for personal use...but no one takes that too seriously, right? I actually once read a statistic that said about 70% of non-work-related-computing-at-work is porn downloading, so at least I haven't stooped that far. (this statistic was likely pre-social networking) Though frankly soon I might. You see, while I usually could care less about techno-specific gadget details, this is monitor is literally the size of a television. Having spent the past year and a half on a 10.1" netbook, I am still in awe. It's actually pretty sexy. Dudes in highschool who decorated their dorms with nothing but a gaming system while I was out scavenging for the perfect neon pink sheets and posters- I think I get it. Not to mention it's bigger than everyone elses. Ha!

Actually it's nice because I can now feel that my job is important and sophisticated, aided by the fact that I just moved into a larger office with a corner desk and a wheely chair. This is of course blatantly untrue, as I am a mere intern and probably the least productive of the interns at that, but hey, we all need goals. Oh, and tomorrow I'm finally getting a BAMF security badge because our building now has a seperate entrance for the Nuclear Disarmament people downstairs. Win.

Come to think of it, I could easily make the argument that this is work related. I mean, you tell me you wouldn't need practice typing on a keyboard that looks like this:

Yeah, that's what I thought.

Time to go now though. Facility closes at 8PM and I've heard that they set the dogs out on anyone here later. Probably untrue, but let's not actually find out. (Oh, the joys of working on the same campus as three nuclear reactors)

Sweep This

Ever since I actually figured out how to play the Minesweeper game that has come free on every Microsoft operating system since the dawn of time (AKA 1995) it has become an all time favorite pastime. There's something oddly entertaining and relaxing about applying more or less the same mental algorithm to each square and occasionally extrapolating with higher logic and probability for hours at a time. (I clearly need better taste in computer games, I know)

But here is my complaint- Minsweeper is arguably a lot harder to play than simple Solitare (the classic "I'm bored at the office" backup for millions of people). But when you beat Solitare, you are rewarded by an awesome, trippy show of bouncing and self-duplicating cards. What do you get when you win a game of minesweeper? Sunglasses. Yes, the little smiley face button (why is it a smiley face anyway? What does that have to do with explosives?) gets a pair of sunglasses. That's IT. And the worst bit? Solitare is ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE to lose, whereas winning a 30x30 game of minesweeper (the largest setting my netbook seems to be able to handle) happens only once in a blue moon.

It's just not right....

Oh, and I'm also convinced that good Minesweeper skills ultimately lead to good H NMR skills. So no, not a waste of time at work, not at all.

Proof

You can't say I didn't warn you...

Oh My Google!

OK, I surrender. No protests, no radical resistance, no guerilla forces. Google has taken over and I accept that. Better yet, I have decided to swear my loyal allegiance to Google here and now, so as to avoid any problems when this becomes mandatory in the far future. Google, I am faithfully yours, there is no need to threaten my family or place dead animals in my bed.


They were clever alright, letting us think that we had control at first. We thought they were helping us with all their useful search engines, then conversion tools, then driving directions, then email, then statistics counters. Soon I suppose there will even be Google fast food restaurants. (Just think: GoogleFood. "Hey, honey I'm hungery, can you google me a burger?") But now we know the truth: They're on top, and resistance is futile.


The proof that Google now posses more power than any other entity on earth? Google Street View. Not only does Google know where you sleep, but it knows where you sleep in 360 degrees. We already have GoogleNews; It's now only a matter of time before "GoogleParty" sprouts up, followed by "GoogleLife."


So remember, if you happen to be doing something that Google might not like and you see one of these:


Run. Just Run.

Pretty in #FFC0CB

I'm not really sure how I feel about pink electronics.


Yes, I know pink is one of my favorite colors.


Yes, I know I should revel in the opportunity that so many things are now available in pink.


But to be honest, it kind of rubs me the wrong way. It's become almost expected in selection choice. What was once "black or white" is now "black, white, or pink." It's the all-too-predictable, looks-savvy, girly option. Where it once took a great feat of passionate and dedicated shopping to find that truly unique, special something in pink; it's now been reduced to the status quo. By purchasing an electronic device in pink, it's almost too clear how well I'm fitting into some (genius) marketing scheme for valley girls, sorrority sisters, and trophy wives. And whatever happenned to all the other dozens of colors in the world anyway? Now a purple computer, that would be something.


But I suppose I shouldn't spend too much time bitching about this. After all, that would render me a horrible hypocrite. Everyone, meet Pinky. She looks something like this:





Pinky is exactly half the size of Sabriel (my main laptop), roughly a third of the weight, and has about 16 times the battery life. (Sadly, I'm not exaggerating). Did I really need a netbook? Couldn't I have just quit my bitching and moaning about back pain, bought a new battery for my laptop, and made do? Maybe. But I'm convinced this thing will somehow exponentially increase my productivity. (Even if it just means I can log onto AE anywhere and get work done in 20-30 minute chunks between construction.) And besides, it's just so damn cute.